Five Baby Products You Absolutely Do Not Need

Look, the internet is going to find out you’re pregnant and start showing you all kinds of unsolicited ads for things you don’t need. Let me save you some hassle and eliminate the following from your registry:

Novelty Pacifiers.

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Very few babies will take these things. More than likely your baby will not take a pacifier or will only take one specific kind. While cute in theory, this is a waste of your time.

The Peepee Teepee.

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The fact that someone has made millions off of this keeps me up at night. This is as added step in the diapering process you just don’t need (and won’t actually use). When your baby is first born, you’ll be too tired to remember and by the time you do, you’ll be at the “wrangling a rabid cat” stage of diapering and this will be useless anyway.

Wiper and/or bottle warmer.

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Again, this will take more time than it is worth. By the time you have warmed the bottle in this contraption or carried your baby across the house to the designated wipe warmer, you’re both crying in frustration. It’s a cold, cold world, baby. Best find out via the wipes, ya know?

Designated Changing Table.

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This may be controversial but I just think this is a waste of space. If you add a changing pad to a dresser, you’re making good use of space. This piece of furniture, on the other hand, will be a thing of the past once you join the ranks of parents who just change the baby on any available flat surface. Trust me, you won’t want to make the trek to the nursery just for this task.

Baby Bath Robes.

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Oh, the are so cute. The animal ears, the fuzziness, the teeny belt. I get the appeal but you will literally never use this and if you try to, you will regret it because you will have a wet, slippery baby who is real mad. Grab a towel and head straight for pajama town.

What would you add to the list?

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