Kids are crazy, man. And nothing is crazier than a toddler with a limited grasp on the english language and absolutely no impulse control. So, now presenting Ten Reasons My Toddler is Crying
- She asked for a cheese stick so I took the wrapper off. I TOOK THE WRAPPER OFF.
- I am trying to change her diaper. She would prefer to keep her dirty diaper on.
- She wants to jump head first off the back of the couch.
- I am peeing and won’t hold her in the process.
- She threw her milk cup in frustration. She wants her milk cup.
- I wouldn’t let her lick the cart handle.
- I won’t give her a sip of my freshly brewed, piping hot coffee.
- She can’t pet the dog on TV.
- Frozen waffles have to be cooked before consumed.
- I insist she buckle her car seat straps. Every. Single. Time.