Back in March, the idea of virtual learning was such an anomaly with its newfangled platforms and vocabulary–Zoom, Canvas, DyKnow–and we all thanked our lucky stars it was just a temporary….
….wait. we. are. still. here.
And now, we are all kind of pros, right? Settled in after nine long months of zooming and chatting and hitting submit. Let’s take a look at a day in the life of a virtual learner, shall we?
8:00 am— Rise and shine. Mama is here and there is no reason I shouldn’t get a full service meal despite the fact that I have lived on cafeteria cereal and milk for the past five years. Bring on the pancakes!
8:30 am— Time to log into Zoom. Mrs. Brown is wearing an elaborate holiday theme complete with a snowy virtual background.
8:35 am— Boooooored. Maybe I can fasten a zipline for the elf out of notebook paper and paper clips.
9:00 am — Busted by mom for being off task while hanging upside down in my chair.
9:30 am –Break time! After complaining all morning about not wanting to stare at the computer screen, I beg to stare at the iPad screen. Denied. Off to play Legos.
10:15 am— Back at it. I sneak snacks during Zoom with the camera off and get peanut butter on the keys.
10:30 am— Time for math homework. Mom says to practice fractions with baking. So I throw flour everywhere and forget to submit my assignment while she’s on a work call.
12:00 pm— Lunch time. I may have pushed mom “over the edge”, as dad says because she says we need to “go for a drive”. Works for me–Chick-fil-A!
12:30 pm — Small group time on Zoom. I tell my teacher all about how my moms underwear goes up her butt and I don’t know how that’s comfy. Mom looks mad.
1:00 pm — Read aloud time! This is my favorite part of the day. I sit captivated by the story for 26 seconds. Then I have to pee. Then I am thirsty. Then I need a snack.
1:30 pm— Schools over. “Outside unless you’re bleeding!”, mom says.
Man, virtual learning is so fun! It’s amazing I ever sat at my desk all day long at school before now!
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